“Veronika hated everything, but mainly she hated the way she lived her life, never bothering to discover the hundreds of other Veronikas who lived inside her and who were interesting, crazy, curious, brave, bold…”
I finished a book last night by one of my favorite authors, Paulo Coelho. It was called “Veronika Decides to Die.” It was recommended to me by a friend that invited me to take part in a book club. I was really intrigued by the idea of having deep, philosophical conversations with other women my age so I gladly accepted. (Not to mention, a great reason to have brunch and cocktails in Manhattan on a Sunday morning.) It’s been a while since I have been in a classroom and I long for that challenge of a good debate. A book club seemed to be a great way to get those intellectual juices flowing.
Only problem I encountered? I have a really difficult time forcing myself to read books when I have a deadline. Give me any other book for recreational reading, and I will tear through it in less than twenty-four hours. I tried to trick myself into reading it. No luck. I even rearranged furniture in the living room to create a “reading nook” where I could sit near my candles, with a hot cup of tea and get the book read. Nothing.
So, needless to say, I missed the book club brunch because I didn’t finish the book. (It was also because I woke up drunk that morning due to a very good friend’s going away party the night before, but that is beside the point.)
I finally finished the book last night. Like all of Mr. Coelho’s books, it really struck a chord somewhere deep inside of me. Isn’t it strange how certain things fall into your lap at just the right time?
The book was about a young girl that decided she wanted to commit suicide. After a failed attempt, she lands in a mental institution where she is told that the damage she caused to her heart is irreversible. She wouldn’t have more than a week to live. In that week, in the words of that handsome Tim McGraw, she began to live like she was dying. She spent most of her adolescent life studying piano. In the hospital, she found a piano and would play tunes that came from the depth of her soul. Notes and themes that she didn’t know she knew how to play. She sang, she dreamed, she came undone and even fell in love.
Without ruining the story—because everyone should read it—she went crazy in order to find her true happiness and purpose in this life. She found a reason to live everyday in knowing that her days were numbered. But if you think about it… all of us are in Veronika’s position. Anything could happen in this crazy life to take it all away from us. An awareness of death should cause us all to live so much more intensely.
So... What are we so frightened of? Why is there a mold that all of us must fit in order to be stable? That ugly treadmill that we all diligently walk on, keeping us in the norm. Afraid to book that trip to Europe for fear that there may not be enough time or money. To look a stranger in the eye and smile because you are attracted to them. To eat food that you have never seen before. To dress in bright colors and be unique. To dance—with everyone watching.
It’s about time and using up every last drop… because all that truly matters in the end is that we LIVED.
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