You know the film "The Pursuit of Happyness?" Well, I finally watched it. I avoided it at all costs because of the previews that made me cry as soon as I heard Christina Aguilera's voice singing that song.
So, we watched it. It was over penne vodka and chicken parmesan fresh after a long night of drinking. It was the perfect day for a really good cry.
I think what struck a cord immediately with me, was the fact that all of these negative things were pushing him further and further down, and he kept trying. I am talking the lowest you could possibly be. Hunger, sadness, depression, homelessness... he kept on believing. He broke down brick walls of obstacles and kept going.
After watching it, it made me want to get up and do something. It made me laugh at myself. At how much I have been harboring my insecurities. I've been letting the thoughts of self doubt fester and help me believe that I won't be able to find what makes me happy. There isn't enough time, there isn't enough money...
I'm tired of pretending that I'm okay with letting myself just be. Just keeping things the way they are. Trying not to shake things up. If I don't do it, no one is going to do it for me.
We are all alone in this thing we call life, and I find consolation in the fact that we are all together in that. I won't be afraid of the what ifs anymore.
The truth is... you cannot count on anyone but yourself.
When they push, when they pull
Tell me can you hold on
When they say you should change
Can you lift your head high and stay strong
Will you give up, give in
When your heart's crying out "that is wrong"
Will you love you for you at the end of it all
Now in life there's gonna be times
When you're feeling low
And in your mind insecurities seem to take control
We start to look outside ourselves
For acceptance and approval
We keep forgetting that the one thing we should know is
Don't be scared
To fly alone
Find a path that is your own
Love will open every door
See in your hands the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know
All the answers you will unfold
What are you waiting for
Spread your wings and soar
The boy who wonders, is he good enough for them
Keep trying to please them all
But he just never seems to fit in
Then there's the girl who thinks she'll never ever be
Good enough for him
He's trying to change and
That's a game she'll never win
In life there will be times when you're feeling low
And in your mind insecurities seem to take control
We start to look outside ourselves
For acceptance and approval
We keep forgetting that one thing we should know is
Don't be scared
To fly alone
Find a path that is your own
Love will open every door
See in your hands the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know
All the answers they will unfold
What are you waiting for
Spread your wings and soar
In the mirror is where she comes
Face to face with her fears
Her reflection looked forward on to her
After all these years
However how she's tried to be
Something besides herself
Now time has passed and she's ended up
Somewhere else with regret
What is it is that makes us feel the need
To keep pretending
Gotta let ourselves be
Don't be scared
To fly alone
Find a path that is your own
Love will open every door
See in your hands the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know
All the answers you will unfold
Don't wait no more
Spread your wings and soar
Find your road
Love will open every door
See in your hands the world is yours
Don't look back in the window, you'll find your way
Always know all the answers will unfold
Oh don't wait
Spread your wings and soar
Don't wait no more
You've got to soar
Spread your wings and soar
Don't wait no more
No don't you wait no more
Spread your wings and soar
You've can soar
So what you waiting for
Don't wait, Don't wait
Soar
-"Soar" by Christina Aguilera
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